The Warrior
‘The Warrior’
This is a 6″x8″ mixed media painting on wood.
Sometimes we need our war paint and other adornments if not to give us strength to go out and face the challenges of the day, to remind us of the battles we have already won .
I am not a ‘warrior’ type of person. I mean this in every sense of the word. I have never embraced the words ‘warrior’, or ‘Goddess’ . It seems kind of scary to me and a little too ‘earthy’. However, this last weekend I went to a Mother Blessing, (completely out of my comfort zone) and it has made me think a lot. Why do I resist this stuff so much? What am I afraid of? I think that the answer could be quite simply that I am afraid of myself. Of who I am. This blessing was so full of love and good wishes for the expectant mother but the following day I could not help but feeling kind of lousy. I felt shallow, selfish, jealous, materialistic and righteous.
I wondered if the fact that I had my two babies by C-section was somehow stopping me from being able to experience the intense, shall we say ‘primal’, feelings that these other women seem to have so abundantly. I had to remind my self that, although different, my experience was still valid. Yet, I couldn’t shake that even my most authentic moment in life was entirely orchestrated.
It wasn’t only my birth experience that seemed to separate me from these other women. I really questioned my ability to express myself as a truly caring and giving person. This seemed to come so easy for everyone else. They were able to express themselves with honesty and clarity. I found it very difficult but I watched these women in awe and admiration.
Hopefully I have learned something from this experience. It definitely has made me think and I that is really positive. I know that I will never be an ‘earth mamma’ but maybe I can try to love and support the people around me a little more, after all what am I waiting for?
And maybe if I start referring to my bright red lipstick as warpaint I can meet them halfway on being a warrior or a Goddess rather that a prima donna or princess.
SOLD
