Drifting In And Out
I finished this painting today.
The title refers to the way our memories fade in and out. Some memories are so clear while others are foggy and transparent. The memories that are clear are not always the most important, often we wonder why we have held on to that memory at all. How can we remember things so vividly from long ago but barely remember things that happened to us last week?
The memory can be selective and often distorted. What is really true, what is fabricated, what is embellished? I often wonder these things. And I often worry what memories I am creating for my children. What are they going to remember? Mommy keeping the house clean? Our walks to the library? Ballet class? Our endless photo sessions? Watching too many Barbie movies? My limited patience? My reclusive tendencies? How will my choices effect them in their adult lives? Did I give them a feeling of entitlement?* And on and on. It sure can be exhausting.
I remember somewhere I heard/read of a woman ( I think it was some film star) saying she had absolutely no memory of her childhood. It was like she didn’t exist before a certain time. I wish I could remember if I had read it or heard it on TV but there you go, my memory fails me. I found that idea fascinating though. No memories of being a child. That would be so odd. I wonder if she ever had children of her own. What kind of Mother was she? How would she relate to their childhood? Surely the memories of our own childhood shape the way we raise our children. For good or for bad. Isn’t that why we hold on to traditions? To try to relive our childhood through our children’s experience of the same things we did when we were children.
I’ll stop now, I could go on and on.
*I am currently reading ‘Outliers’ by Malcolm Gladwell
This painting is available on etsy
IF ‘Breezy’ – Girl With Red Balloon
Every time she held a balloon she couldn’t help worrying that it just might blow away.
I did this 8″x10″ painting this morning. She looks to the future, I see the past. Somehow we both have to try to enjoy our moments together right now without letting these thoughts get in the way. Somehow, as a Mother, I need to teach her these skills so that she can be content and happy with what she has right now.
Available on etsy.
Girl With Orange Cat On Red Chair
This is a new 8″x10″ mixed media painting on canvas.
This painting is from my too small series. It shows my daughter Imogen wearing my party dress from when I was five.
I see myself as a little girl in her. I know when she wears it, she is pretending to be a grown up.
Already she is living in the future, while her mother’s memories are so easily triggered by the ghost of a dress.
SOLD.
Painting In Progress
I haven’t posted anything lately. Life gets in the way sometimes.
Here is a new painting that I am working on. This was my party dress from when I was five.(It also has a Holly Hobby pinafore that goes over top.) Now Imogen wears them for dress up. Once again, the past and the present intertwine into one.
I think that I am almost finished this one. Almost. It is harder to know with some paintings.
SOLD
IF ‘Instinct’ Little Red Riding Hood
Little red riding hood knew she shouldn’t have strayed from the path. Her mother had told her not to. It was just that she wanted her grandmother to feel better and knew that the sight of wild flowers would put a smile on her face. But now, it was getting dark and she had the strangest feeling. You know that feeling. Like she was no longer alone. Like someone was watching her.
Little red riding hood stopped picking flowers and stood up straight. Standing silently she listened for movement in the dark woods surrounding her. She moved the freshly picked flowers up toward her face. ‘Maybe their sweet smell would calm her’, she thought to herself, but this feeble gesture did nothing to ease her increasing feeling of dread. The harder she tried to listen, the louder her heartbeat pounded in her ears. She was all at once being taken over by a horrible sense of foreboding. Like she was being devoured, body and soul, by fear itself.
Scarlett and The Blue Hydrangeas
This is a new painting of Scarlett in Nanny and Grandpa’s backyard. Kind of reminds me of ‘Alice in Wonderland’, which really, when you think about it, describes Victoria perfectly. It truly is a wonderland.
This is a 16″x16″ mixed media painting on a 1″ deep wood stretcher. The sides are painted red.
IF ‘Celebrate’ -Life’s First Breath
Congratulations Penelope and Colin! Life’s First Breath is always something to ‘celebrate’. My eldest daughter’s first breath was eight minutes to eight in the morning and I am still celebrating the miracle of her birth five years ( and another daughter) later.
(Especially when she goes to bed on time).
Sydney and Imogen
Chris took this photo of Sydney and Imogen with this iphone. Aren’t they sweet!?
ACEO The Sad Ballerina
Here is another study of the sad ballerina with the hole in her tights. Poor thing, nothing worse than a hole in your dance tights.
This is a 2.5″x3.5″ mixed media painting on rag paper and is available in my Etsy shop.
ACEO Joy 2
This is a new ACEO I did recently. I have been challenging myself trying to capture extreme expressions without having them look distorted or unatural. It is hard. I think I managed to do it. I love the way children really feel the joy with their whole body. Head back, mouth open. Just pure pleasure in the moment.
This one is available in my etsy shop.
Also, this painting was included in a new treasury on etsy called It’s A Dog’s Life
This one is called ‘My Red Guitar’ and is available on Etsy
Leopard Print and Tiger Lilies
Another new mixed media painting. I have to admit, leopard print is one of my guilty pleasures. I know to some it is condisdered tacky but I just can’t help it! I kind of shy away from wearing it myself (most but not all of the time) but I have no problem dressing my kids up in it. No problem at all!
Oh, and is it ever FUN to paint!
SOLD
Balanced
A new painting, ‘Balanced’, 18″x24″, mixed media on wood stretcher.
I found this amazing photo on http://clancysclassics.blogspot.com/, actually in her etsy shop. Check out her beautiful work. She graciously let me use this image for a print of the final painting. Thanks Marianne!
Undecided
Another painting from my new series “Too Small, Too Young”.
Undecided, 15.5 “x 20”, mixed media painting on wood stretcher.
This series is about being a child now, looking back and/or remembering being a child and also about being an adult/parent watching your child grow up. It is bitter sweet to say the least.
Sometimes I find myself looking at my children and feeling unbearably sad. I know that this sounds crazy but it is because I am not really looking at them right now, instead I am thinking about how much smaller they were not so long ago or how soon they are going to be all grown and leaving me. Awful I know, but it is the truth. I think about how far away my own childhood seems now, how foggy my memories are. How young my parents were.
In many ways, these are timeless paintings. They live neither in or out doors but exist simultaneously in both. If as though, our memories can be in some other plain all together, existing in our mind but also in this place that shifts back and forth, in and out of focus. Often hard for us to grasp completely, save a snippet here, a smidgen there.
I guess in these works I am trying to capture childhood, mine and my children’s and to somehow hold onto it for a little bit longer. If I can’t manage it in real life, perhaps painting it will help me remember to think less and be more.
IF Voices
‘Rape as a weapon of war.’
I was watching Mia Farrow speak about the horrible atrocities that are happening in the Congo right now and this really seems to fit with the topic this week. She promised these people to use her voice so the world would hear their plight. It is so horrible what is happening to these women and children. Let’s all use our voice to get this story heard.
Yell it out!
For more information link here.
Circus Girl and Elephant
This is a 11.5X15.5″ mixed media painting of circus girl being rocked to sleep by Harriet, the circus elephant.
ACEO The Girl And The Pear
This is a painting if Scarlett stealing a pear. I have this stool from IKEA that has felt on the bottom and she can move that thing around and get up to where she wants to before I even know what is up. Most of the time it is to steal food. Honest, I DO feed her!
Oh, and look, there is another empty chair. For those of you that follow my blog, you will know what I mean. For those of you that don’t, get with the program!
SOLD
ACEO Willows Beach
At the end of September we went to Victoria. September weather is usually pretty reliable and this was no exception. We had a few beach days with the girls. Scarlett is totally into the beach right now. She would throw rocks in the water and scoop water into her sand bucket forever.
This little ACEO is of Scarlett sitting on one of my favorite beaches in Victoria; Willows. In the summer you can get crinkle fries from the little tea house and eat them right on the beach. On a rainy day, you can sit inside and have a cup of tea. It is nothing fancy, it is charity run, but it is one of my most favorite things
SOLD
IF Similar
The Orange Peelers, 1.5’x5′, mixed media on canvas, 2008
A Favorite topic of mine. The ‘Orange Peeler’ Factory. This idea came about when I handed Scarlett a bowl of tiny little oranges and she spent 2o minutes peeling them. In a two year old’s world this is a very long time. Anyway, that was the inspiration and then I just let my imagination fly!
Just Too Small
This is a 24″x24″ mixed media painting on wood. The sides are painted tangerine. I actually did this one a few weeks ago but only just got around to taking a photo of it. If I can’t scan it in, ( just too large! HA!) I get a little lazy.
This one came about when a woman I am doing a large commission for was talking about empty chairs in paintings or photographs and how they made the individual viewer feel. It seems that for some people it made them feel sad and lonely and for other it was more welcoming. I couldn’t get the empty chair out of my head so when I was painting this one I decided to incorporate it. I made it a kind of ghost like child’s chair. She seems to be just leaving it to go forward, onward, to something else. Something more interesting. Such is life.
How do you feel about an empty chair in a photo or painting?
ACEO Circus Girl Study
This is an original mixed media ACEO on 100% rag paper of Circus Girl . I am in the process of writing a Children’s book about circus girl. This is another study of her. She really is one of my favorite characters to paint. The more I paint her, the more I know her and, the more I love her. I hope that you feel the same way.
